Renewing Personal Vision

For years, I’ve written the following personal vision on top of my resume:

Live an adventurous life that is meaningful for society, inspirational for those around me, and true to my heart. Share my love for the mountains and the outdoor environment. Help others discover health and happiness, and ways to live better. Be engaged in work that stimulates my skills and strengths, and fulfills my desire to learn, to lead, and to do what’s right.

Yesterday, I spent my last day on a job that was supposed to be in fulfillment of this vision: director of a mountain sports school. Perfect, right? But I found myself behind the computer running the business operations of a $5+ million revenue center. In the past 14 months, I was outside participating and leading adventurous activities less than I had in my previous 40 years in the business of ski and snowboard coaching and outdoor leadership. I was impacting culture and helping others discover health and happiness, yes, but the job took away the best of me for whatever reason, I lost my stimulation and inspiration, and I decided it was time to move on.

In my mind, I was going to give the job two years, enough time to develop new programs, facilitate changes, train and inspire replacements, and re-evaluate. When I stood up to speak at the returning staff orientation meeting last week, I realized I was a shell of who I am. I remembered that life is precious and too important to waste time not feeling “like me” (especially after enduring family struggles and losses in previous months and years). Because I didn’t make it through my personal goal of two years, and because I have let down those who believed in me, I have been dealing with feelings of remorse, second-guessing, and self-doubt.

But today, like other days in my past when my mind doubted my purpose and my capability to succeed, I took to physical challenge. I said to myself, “I am a person who has competed in triathlons; rode my bicycle over 200 miles in a day, twice; rode on a mountain-bike tandem with my wife about 500 miles in a week and over the continental divide twice; received advanced degrees from prestigious institutions, in engineering nonetheless, and built successful businesses; and I have endured the heartbreak of tragic events and the struggles of people close to me. I can get through this! I am a warrior!”

So, I got up this morning and in the space of one hour, I did 100 pull-ups, 100 weighted barbell squats with 225 pounds, 100 push-ups, and 50 dips. Now, this might not sound that great for some of you. But, I am almost 56 years old and I have spent the last 14 months behind a desk or traveling in a car, my body fat percentage has doubled, my weight has increased, my stress-level was off-the-charts, and my cardio conditioning is the worst its ever been!

But today, I am back in the game! Looking for my next work, my next ways to fulfill my personal vision, yes, but realizing again that I can do anything I decide, anything that I want to do! For me, there is something in my sense of integrity that requires  me to be my authentic me, inspiring others through real-life, walk-the-walk, personal inspiration and self-discovery, global impact through local action, and role-modeling positivity.

Thanks to the people in my life who continue to inspire me!

I’m Not the Man I Used to Be… More Thoughts on Leadership

Our deepest calling is to grow more and more into our authentic self — this is the work of a leader — and constitutes the redefinition of past leadership models.

We are all called to leadership. Leaders consider this life precious and are thus willing to act deliberately in service to life. Moreover, leadership is an inward journey into the depths of what it means to be human.

Leadership is about being fully expressed, about being called to one’s greatness, and about having the courage to act in ways that are in alignment with one’s highest self. The world relies on each of us to heed the call of our heart. There is a divine unfolding of life to hear your personal calling, and the path of yoga can provide the tools to answer this call, and to live a life of possibility, passion and integrity. By liberating your own heart and stepping fully into your authenticity you inspire others to do the same — this is the new way of leadership.

– Coby Kozlowski

[It All Started with Joel]

This week, I resigned from a prestigious position at a well-known resort at probably the worst time of the year. You might say I broke- publicly and painfully. I feel bad for those I’ve let down. But, I realized that I wasn’t living my life, for whatever reason; that my life is indeed precious; and that there was no better time than now for me to explore my authentic awesomeness. You might also say that Hanuman forced me to take a leap of faith… again… Or that my Dad guides my way.

It’s interesting that the vision I championed in my former work was all about being inspired, about learning, and about serving the guests that came to our Green Mountain resort. “Be your authentic self… and be inspired!” But the world relies on each of us to heed the call of our heart. For me, it was time for me to take the next step in my authentic life of inspiring leadership, from my heart.

Part of adapting to a changing world is realizing that each of us changes too. We grow. We experience things. We learn. We adapt. If we view ourselves from the perspective that we are always the same, it can be harder to adapt as things change around us. If we view ourselves from the perspective that we are always changing, it can be easier to cope with external changing circumstances… and have success in finding our true selves.

We’re not who we used to be. We are who we are. And it is what it is. In our ever-changing life experiences and our constant growth and adaptation towards our authentic selves, we learn about who we are, we hear our own life’s calling, and we step into our own authenticity, leading others in the process. I learned a lot about myself this past year; it’s time to move forward and learn more.

I’m not who I used to be. It is important for me to look at the future with open eyes and an open heart… not based alone on what I can do based on previous experience and expertise… but based on my quest to grow in alignment with my highest self.

I always felt like snow sports provided me inspiration to be my higher self. Nowadays, there is something more heartfelt and sacred that inspires my current pursuit of an even higher self. It’s something to do with Oneness and the connectedness of a happier (and healthier) society and a sustainable planet.

It’s time for me to say to myself: “Celebrate impermanence. Live and learn. Step fully into your authentic awesomeness, inspire others with good intentions and a compassionate and joyous heart,  and lead in a positive, dignified, and connected way!”

Go for a Hike!

Today, I went for a hike. Recently, I “haven’t had the time” to go for a hike. Now I do. So I did. Jo and I…

When I am in nature, I usually find myself in a state of mind where I want to stop and look at the beauty of the clouds or the light of the sky or the color of the trees. When I do this, I open myself up to awe and wonder. I feel intimately connected to something inconceivably huge… I am a part of my environment, not apart from it.

When I combine the power of a mindfulness-based or yoga experiences in nature with the heartfelt connection of others, the experience has the ability to open me up to extraordinary feelings of radiance and being alive.

My daily practices of enhancing my own personal wellness are about increasing the amount of time I spend every day cultivating this relationship with nature and with others. It’s what makes me healthier and what helps me manifest my dreams and my daily intentions.

It’s also the foundation of what I do, whether coaching wellness or sports, managing people or projects, or designing sustainable homes and healthy buildings. Mind-body awareness and presence… feelings of being a part of nature… and heartfelt connection with those around me.

Tomorrow, I will go for another hike.

Reflections on Leadership and Success

Recently, a history teacher in the school district where my dad lived for 55 years recently wrote a note to my nephews (my dad’s grandkids): “History is the story of ordinary people who did extraordinary things.” My dad was “the best extraordinary example” he knew. “His passion, energy, and willingness to do what was good for children created a leadership style that was positive and infectious, causing people to be willing to follow his lead.”

Passion. Positive. Goodness. Today is my day to do something extraordinary. Maybe it will start with just doing something good to make another ordinary person feel extraordinary. If I can do this positively and with passion as a daily practice, maybe I too will have succeeded as a leader?

Success? I like what Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote:

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty;

To find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

My dad passed away 3 months ago. He was a mentor for many. He still is for me.

Which Real World? Seeing the World through Different Eyes

I wrote this article about 16 years ago, long before there was blogging in my world. It is reprinted from The Cracker Barrel (Fall / Winter Issue 1996-97). It is interesting how much the experience in this article guided my life since this time, and how much I find myself using today what I learned then. For me, this is what experiential education is all about.

How many times have you had someone ask you, “So what do you do in the real world?” In a resort community frequented by visi­tors who are usually trying to get away from a faster paced lifestyle, I bet the question is asked quite often. As an employee of Mount Snow, I’m asked the question every day. I usual­ly reply first with a puzzled look to get some clarification, but then give in and acknowledge that I too have a job in their world.

As the Deerfield Valley has become my primary home, I’ve thought more and more about how to answer the question. Isn’t my world of teaching skiing and biking here at Mount Snow the real world? Isn’t our world of a resort community, nestled within the lush forests of the Green Mountain National Forest, real? Why do we see our world as separate worlds, city and forest, mountain and valley, work and play, mine and yours?

Well, one thing I know is that I’ve only learned as much as I know, so if I don’t know, I’ve got some more learning to do! Recently, I set out on an expedition to do some more learning. In June, I spent a month in the eastern Cascades of Washington state with a group of outdoor educators in the National Outdoor Leadership School (NOLS). Not knowing exactly what it was that I wanted to learn, I knew the experience would help me see things differently, hopefully giv­ing me new perspectives that would help me understand more about all of my worlds. I spent a month above snow-line in a group of nine, travel­ing many miles per day in wet spring snow, climbing thousands of feet on rugged pitches sometimes approach­ing 45 degrees, and sharing our lives on a daily basis. I managed to have time to ponder a few thoughts on liv­ing in my multiple worlds, on how what I learn in one world really does apply in the other.

The best leaders are also the best coaches. It is not enough to tell someone you work with or live with just what to do and how to do it, you must give them the tools, show them how, motivate and coach them.

Jeremy was a nineteen year old college student from Michigan studying outdoor recreation. The son of two professional psychologists, he was sort of a free-spirit guy who didn’t pay much attention to details before jumping in and just doing things. He was the guy who stood on the edge of a cliff without being tied off, who would not think twice about the risks before crossing a rushing mountain stream, who would acci­dentally spill the boiling water you had just made from melting snow with a limited supply of stove fuel! Jeremy was also the guy we called The Bonk-in-ator because every after­noon, after a long day of backcountry travel… bonk! No more energy. He’d get quiet, doubt his capabilities, and slow down.

It was interesting to see how Jeremy responded to different leader­ship styles. It wasn’t enough to tell him to eat more food and drink more water. It wasn’t enough to just tell him how to take care of his feet. Every day, bonk! He had no energy to go on or to take care of himself once we reached a suitable overnight camp. Finally, because the success of the group depended on the success of each individual, we started to coach him. We showed him what to eat and when to drink. We even carried snack food for him. We gave him support and encouragement. We made him feel good about himself and his role in the group. And in the end, Jeremy was a vital link in the success of our group.

In business, isn’t it also an essen­tial ingredient of company profitability that staff succeeds and be satisfied, in addition to the customer? Maybe we all need to be better coaches in whatever world we are involved in. Maybe I can even apply some of my ski teaching skills to my engineering career?

Conserve energy. Work on what’s important.

 There has been much written on time management. I like what Dr. Stephen Covey speaks about in “First Things First”‘. Spend your time on what’s important; what is part of your personal value system. In skiing, we try to coach people to mini­mize excess motion which disturbs balance. In mountain biking and other endurance sports, we talk about not wasting energy and about relaxed breathing. In our personal lives, it may be about spending more time with the kids or participating in a community activity.

It was a long day. We climbed 2000 feet after leaving the town of Holden on Lake Chelan. Our packs were filled with our new rations of a week and a half. We picked up additional ropes and climbing gear for the ter­rain ahead. Our packs were heavy. We traversed avalanche slide areas and bushwhacked through alders and slide debris. As we sat on our packs, resting, waiting for the other part of our group at the designated meeting spot, we were silent. On all sides above and around us were the steep pitches of snow, rock, and avalanche debris which covered the slopes of a large, glacial cirque. Our route south to our next ration point, 10 days away, was up and out of the cirque.

We decided, as a group, that the only way we would get all members of our group up, over, and back down the other side in one day, would be to start early when the slope was still frozen. Afternoon slush had a greater likelihood of slid­ing and the slopes we were on were very susceptible. We had decided not to carry our crampons on this ration period because of the weight and the snow conditions. Our strategy meant that a few of us would have to kick steps in the snow, up a 1500 feet high pitch, late in the afternoon, so that they would set up for the rest of the group and allow early morning trav­el. At that moment, it became very clear to me what conserving energy meant! Determine what is impor­tant, and focus on it each and every step of the way!

 If something unexpected happens, deal with it immediately.

On the way down that same range, Jeremy accidentally slipped into another member of our group. Luckily, no one was hurt. However, Joanna, a small, careful, and very detail-oriented professional women, was inwardly very upset with the more casual Bonk-in-ator. Jeremy, constantly under the guiding hands of various group members, was inwardly embarrassed and felt detached from the rest of the group. And we still had to descend the most treacherous terrain on ropes, depending entirely on one another. This was no time for pent-up anger and ill-willed feelings.

How many times in my life had I not been able to deal with a situation effectively because of pent-up feelings which I had not previously dealt with? I try to remember this situa­tion with Jeremy and Joanna con­stantly now when I feel something brewing within.

Our individual worlds are as big or as small as we want them to be, or as encompassing as we see them, but in the end, they’re all connected.

For 15 years, I spent the majority of my life engineering structures for buildings where attention to detail was my world. I became immersed in it. On weekends, however, I was drawn to the grandeur of the moun­tains. There, teaching skiing was my world. There, standing atop the mountain on a clear winter night, everything seemed so distant from my other world.

I think it was our third night together on our expedition. It was another long day. We didn’t find a site near water until near nightfall. We dug small shelters in the snow to protect our tents from the cool winds which blew down over us to the long valley below. After eating, we all sat down to discuss who we were, where we were from, and why we were there. Not just names and places, but who we really were. What events and influences brought us to be who we were at that particular time and place? I sat there and listened to Rick read a Native American story. I looked up to the stars, which looked just like they do from the top of Mount Snow, and down to the dis­tant lights in the valley which also looked so familiar. It occurred to me that everything I had experienced in my life brought me to that moment. Everything.

It was that moment which gave me the focus for this article. For the rest of the trip, for the rest of my vacation to this unfamiliar land, my thoughts became directed on how my experiences on that adventure were connected to my real world. It seemed like the more I learned, the more I could begin to see all of the connections between my other worlds. As I have seen the connec­tions, the more I have wanted to apply them in whatever real world I was in.

Our environment is our world. Our earth, our atmosphere, and all forms of life they support, are connected. We are each a vital link.

One last experience… It was the end of our trip. We were picked up by a van after living for three weeks with the forest as our friend and with each tree as our companion. Tired from a twelve mile hike out of the woods, yet elated at the thought of a shower (Jeremy ran out!), a sudden silence overcame the whole group. Just as the sounds of U2’s Bullet the Blue Sky came on the radio, the chop­pers of a cut and run logging opera­tion flew overhead suspending the trunks of salvaged timbers. The music rang out “Outside is America…” I was a cultural shock; a rude awakening to the real world. We were trying to understand. Suddenly, my perspective changed. I could no longer look at distant lands and forests, and what goes on in them, as being separate from my real world. My world just got bigger. Just like guests who come to our southern Vermont community and take away experiences they will always remem­ber, the forests were telling me, “Don’t forget about us.”

About the author: Bob has been a structural engineer with Ryan-Biggs Associates in Troy, NY, for 13 years. He has also been teaching skiing for over 20 years. Recently, Bob changed his real world and is the Director of Staff Training for Skier Development at Mount Snow, VT. He spends many winter nights snowshoeing on top of the mountain look­ing out at both worlds.